Sunday, May 9, 2010

Ft Jackson, SC Day 1 & 2

Day 1

So I said my goodbyes yesterday to my family at about 0700. Technically, this is day 6 for me, because I have spent 5 days with NMPS in San Diego – but I was one of the lucky few that lived locally, and got to go home every night. NMPS Monday and Tuesday were the worst- a lot of briefs and long days – after that, it was easy, early days, so early that I was able to spend the morning with Chris Thursday – then the afternoon Friday with my parents. It was nice. Today, however, was D Day. The kids didn’t know that I was leaving Saturday until about 10 pm Friday night. That made for a very somber night. This morning, Chris showed up at about 6 am. This morning was the hardest morning. My mom finally broke down, my kids all broke down and I saw my dad cry for the first time in years. It was heart wrenching to feel this way. It hurt to hold them, and not know if this were going to be the last time I hold them, or see them. Not that I am completely worried about not coming home, but it would be naïve of me to believe that it couldn’t happen to me. As much as I promise my family I will come home alive and sane, I surely hope that it is a promise I can keep. I have heard some horror stories and quite honestly it has me a little scared… but, not overly scared. Enough to be cautious and realistic about the war zone I am about to enter. I have seen convoy videos, I have heard of snipers, and definitely seen the traps that were set to ambush the military. I have been in for 17 years and this will be the first time I have seen a war zone. I do feel like this is my duty. It is my turn. I am ready, a bit nervous as anyone would be.. but.. ready for the challenge. Chris drove me to 32nd street where we said our goodbyes and then about 30 minutes later we were bused to the airfield where we sat until about 1230. We loaded up the C9 (about 2 hrs later than planned) and took off at 1 headed for Ft Jackson. Shortly into the flight, the airman announced we would be stopping in Ft Worth due to mechanical problems. We were able to find out that it was auto pilot that was not working.. but within about an hour or so, I guess they were able to fix it and we were headed towards Columbia SC, again. We arrived about 9 local time. The weather was GREAT. Not a lot of humidity, just enough of a breeze.. perfect temp. Once unloaded from the plane we all (57 of us) loaded up into two busses and headed towards the army camp where we are trained for roughly 3 weeks. Once arriving (about 45 minutes later) here we were given out accommodations, sheets, a meal and told to go drink at the little club a few doors down – because for most of us, it would be our last opportunity until we arrive home from our IA. So after unpacking most of my stuff, I did just that. Went and sat with some of the enlisted folks and had a couple glasses of wine and came back here to my bunk at about 1 am. Now, its time for bed… and I get to sleep in.. nothing to do until 1500..

Day 2

Woke up this morning about 830… which was about 530 (according to my internal clock)… but.. it didn’t help that I am in berthing with about 60 women.. open bay.. so every time someone comes in, gets stuff out of their lockers or uses the head (Navy term for bathroom) – it makes lots of noise. Anyhow, I was fortunate enough to not have to wake up at 5 am local time.. because I am sure my internal clock would have been screaming at me.. “Hey.. its only 2 am .. what the hell are you doin??” lol Anyhow, got up, took a shower and waited around (cleaning out my locker/rack) for lunch. Lunch was actually pretty good.. I can’t complain. What I had would equate to a sub sandwich at subway. After lunch most of us just kinda tooled around, exploring the minimart and waiting for the brief at 1500. The brief took about 2 hours. It was simply telling us what the big picture schedule was going to be like and then we were all released. A few of us took the bus out to the big AAFES (exchange) to get a few misc items and then came back. I have talked to the kids several times today, but it’s definitely hard. Katrina is taking it pretty hard, as I figured she would. I only wish she knew and understood that in time, it will get easier and she will get in a routine. It doesn’t mean she won’t miss me.. but we will all get in our routines and life will flow. I am pretty lucky – we have wifi in our berthing, so I can get online and talk to the kids via FB/email/texting etc. So – I do. I try to talk to them as much as possible to comfort them. Poor Tylor is having a rough time too and everytime I call – is very concerned with how I am doing and holding up over here. It is very sweet! Travis is having a hard time, as well.. but trying to be a tough guy..but its apparent when I talk to him, and the tone of his voice, that this is hard on him too. In some small way, I truly hope he, most of all, learns to appreciate me when I am there… as he realizes what life is like when I am not. He did tell me today it was hard because they wanted to crawl in bed with me last night, but I wasn’t there. Its heartbreaking to hear the pain in their voice, but I know in time it will lessen as they resume normal life. Katrina had her first training session for the pageant yesterday. Apparently it went quite well and was a good way to keep the whole family occupied for a few hours in downtown San Diego. I hope they stay quite busy – to help them pass the time.
As for me, I am doing okay. I am trying to separate the emotional side.. the hurt from missing them, and my parents – in order to do what I need to do with a positive attitude. I miss them. It was nice having my mom at home for a couple weeks and I find myself homesick for her- which is crazy since its been almost 20 years since I have lived with her!  But its good. I know she is hurting, scared and trying to stay busy. And no amount of words can comfort her or give her the confidence that her baby girl will be alright in the war zone I am about to enter – but I guess if it were me.. and my daughter, I would feel the same. I am anxious to get started.. to get there, get settled and start the journey. This will be an amazing experience I am sure, and one that I will remember and be proud of for the rest of my life. I will say that this experience, even just this far, has made me realize that when I do get to my 20 years (in 3 years) I will retire. I will retire my family from the constant pain of losing their mom. I will complete my journey with the Navy, and move on to my next career – in law. I am happy and excited about this decision and know in my heart that it is the right thing to do. Anyhow, now I am just rambling. Its 2130 and almost time for lights out (2200) so I will sign off for now. More tomorrow…

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for sharing this Tanya, but most of all, thank you for your personal sacrifice so that all of us may continue to live in the freedom we are use to.
    Kevin Gibb

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